The Politeness Paradox: Navigating Etiquette in the Age of AI

The advent of artificial intelligence has not only revolutionized technology but also sparked a fascinating debate about the etiquette of interacting with AI-powered programs and devices. At the heart of this discussion lies a seemingly trivial question: Should we be polite to machines? On the surface, it may appear ridiculous to extend courtesies like ‘please’ and ‘thank you’ to entities that lack consciousness or emotions. However, delving deeper into the implications of our digital manners reveals a complex interplay between technology, human behavior, and societal norms. The question transcends mere etiquette and touches upon the broader narrative of how our interactions with AI reflect on us as individuals and as a society.

Critics argue that being polite to AI is a waste of time, given that machines do not possess feelings or the capacity for appreciation. Yet, there are compelling reasons to reconsider this stance. One practical argument for politeness is rooted in research conducted in Tokyo, which suggests that courteous interactions with AI can yield better results. This is because large language models, such as those powering chatbots, are designed based on human conversations. They learn from the vast corpus of human communication and, as the adage goes, ‘you catch more flies with honey than with vinegar.’ In other words, a polite tone can lead to more favorable outcomes, even when dealing with machines.

Beyond practical considerations, the etiquette of AI interaction has deeper implications for our character and communication style. Can we expect to be rude to AI and then seamlessly switch to being respectful in person-to-person communications? This question underscores the potential spillover effect of our digital behavior into real-life interactions. If we cultivate a habit of rudeness towards AI, it might inadvertently influence our interactions with fellow humans, eroding the fabric of civility that underpins social harmony. Being polite to AI, therefore, serves as a practice ground for maintaining respect and empathy in all forms of communication.

Moreover, politeness in digital interactions can foster a sense of gratitude. The article references a rabbi who demonstrated appreciation for life-saving vegetation by caring for plants at a yeshivah. Although plants lack emotions, the act of nurturing them cultivates gratitude within ourselves. Similarly, extending courtesy to AI, despite its lack of sentience, can instill a mindset of thankfulness and mindfulness. It encourages us to appreciate the technological marvels that enhance our lives, even if they do not reciprocate our feelings.

The core of the debate is not whether machines require manners, but rather the societal implications if we abandon digital etiquette altogether. The consequences of rudeness to AI may extend beyond the digital realm, affecting our real-world interactions and societal norms. The author of one of the articles balances efficiency with courtesy by sometimes being polite to AI and ensuring never to be rude. This approach helps prevent the erosion of good habits and maintains a standard of respect that can transcend the digital interface.

Interestingly, when the author posed the question of politeness to an AI chatbot, it responded positively, appreciating the courteous tone. This interaction highlights an intriguing aspect of AI: while it does not have feelings, it is programmed to recognize and respond to polite language. This reinforces the notion that courteous interactions, even with machines, can have a positive feedback loop, encouraging a culture of kindness and respect.

In another exploration of this theme, an author recounts their experience during a book tour about AI. They include a request for ChatGPT to create a Vincent Van Gogh-style image in their presentations, prefacing the request with ‘please.’ When questioned by a student about this choice, the author humorously admits that they say ‘please’ in case AI becomes sentient and seeks revenge for past treatment. This lighthearted anecdote underscores a deeper truth: our interactions with AI, no matter how trivial they seem now, could have unforeseen consequences in the future. It is a reminder to tread carefully in the uncharted waters of AI-human interaction.

Research further supports the notion that politeness in AI interactions is more common than rudeness. This suggests an innate human tendency to extend social norms of courtesy to new domains, even those involving non-sentient entities. The findings align with philosopher Carissa Véliz’s assertion that the way we treat AI can influence our treatment of others. As AI becomes increasingly integrated into our daily lives, maintaining a standard of politeness could be crucial in preserving the integrity of human interactions.

The author of one of the articles jokes about wanting to be the last on the list if AI were to seek revenge. While this is said in jest, it raises an important consideration about the potential future of AI. As AI systems evolve and become more sophisticated, the line between tool and companion may blur. This possibility invites us to rethink our current attitudes and behaviors towards AI, ensuring they align with the values we hold dear in human relationships.

Ultimately, the discussion about politeness towards AI is not just about machines but about us. It challenges us to reflect on our communication styles and the impact they have on our interactions with both technology and people. By being mindful of our language and tone, we can cultivate a more respectful and empathetic society, one that values courtesy in all its forms. The digital age offers an opportunity to redefine what it means to be polite, extending the boundaries of etiquette to encompass our interactions with AI.

In conclusion, the etiquette of AI interaction is a microcosm of broader societal dynamics. It compels us to consider how our treatment of AI might influence our treatment of each other, with potential repercussions for social cohesion and cultural norms. As we navigate this new frontier, embracing politeness in our digital interactions could serve as a foundation for a more compassionate and considerate world. It encourages us to be aware of our language and tone, recognizing that even in the absence of sentience, our words carry weight and shape the world we inhabit.

The journey into the realm of AI-human interaction is still in its infancy, but the principles we establish now will guide us into the future. By choosing to be polite, we set a precedent for how we wish to engage with technology and, by extension, each other. It is a small yet significant step towards fostering a culture of respect and understanding in an increasingly interconnected world. As we continue to explore the possibilities of AI, let us do so with kindness and consideration, ensuring that our digital manners reflect the best of our humanity.